Dear Oxford Tube,

Please stop claiming all of your buses have WiFi when quite clearly they don’t. If it doesn’t work it doesn’t count!

Regards

Dear Oxford Tube,

Please stop claiming all of your buses have power sockets when quite clearly they don’t. If they don’t work it doesn’t count!

Regards

Dear ASA,

Please see the attached 2 letters to Oxford Tube, detailing inadequacies in their service advertisement.

Regards

Disclaimer, this was posted from an Oxford Tube bus who’s WiFi worked for about 30 seconds at a time.

The car park was extremely busy, with only a couple of spaces free. The majority of these were being used by the car cleaning company who go around the car park cleaning cars whilst you shop. They have a little cart with them, these seemed to all be left in the way, filling up what little spaces there were. Bad start.

Into the store, plenty of sandwiches left, good good, now to the tills, 10 items or less tills, 2 of 4 open. 10 people in each queue, took 20 mins to get through. At least this gave me the chances to notice all the other stuff going on.

What I noticed, first off was the member of staff on his lunch break, in Tesco uniform chatting to a random person in the queue. Telling them how shit the company was, how it has gone down hill in recent years due to terrible store management. It went on and on.

The woman on the till next to me, looked rough as anything, didn’t take long to overhear the reason for this. She was very quick to tell all the customers how hungover she was.

The optician, yes Tesco have an in store opticians, however instead of doing anything with the 3 customers there, continued to paint her nails.

When I thought it couldn’t get any funnier, the alarm on the main door went off, looking over in a nosey fashion as you do, I saw the security guide not giving a rats, and continued his conversation with two people.

Now, why do I care? I worked in this store for 2 years a number of years ago. I know what you should be doing and what you shouldn’t, and what you can get away with and what you can’t. It appeared to me that in this half hour spent in store, standards have really dropped.

Firstly let me introduce Darren Pattinson, born in Grimsby he soon moved to Australia when just aged 6. Of course not his own doing (at a guess). He then spent the next twenty odd years down under having BBQs and eating Kangaroo’s. My reaction to his call up was similar to that of Beefy and The Village Cricketer, little knowledge of who this guy was. A little research later and I found a lovely post by Jrod, who refers to him as Eyelids, and mentions, sarcastically, that he would be playing for England soon.

So why was he selected? Basically with the suspected injury of Jimmy Anderson and Ryan Sidebottom it was necessary to call up a second potential replacement bowler, Tremlett was already on the side lines to fill in if Sidebottom was injured. Strangely it turned out that Sidebottom wasn’t fit to play, so you would think Tremlett would fit in nicely. Nope, the nod went to Pattinson. Now I have no problem with bringing new players in, but I wonder why? The best logic I’ve heard so far is from Micky Vaughan who stated that his suspicions on the Headingley pitch was that he would need bowlers to pitch the ball up. Something I guess Tremlett has not made a career of doing, neither has Harmison or Jones (two other names who probably should be considered in any bowling discussion). Leaving one name, Hoggard, yeah the guy who has played at Headingley, for Yorkshire for god knows how many years. Surely he should have been the first name back on the team sheet? The utter madness seems shared by the Third Umpre, in this uber kudos post about all the problems the England team face.

I guess more ranting / confusion to come after the next test…